The Tales They Tell - NYTimes.com

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By KAREN STABINER

In a way, this is a familiar story: A dedicated teacher exhorts her pupils to reach deep within themselves for intimate details of their personal struggles, knowing that sharing these truths will have a profound impact on their lives.

The difference here is that most of the students are old enough to be their teacher’s mother or father; the average age in Mary Jane Roberts’s writing class is about 80. The jostling among her most devoted students for front-row seats “is always some traffic jam,” she said, often involving walkers and wheelchairs.

For 18 years, Ms. Roberts, 62, has taught a class she calls “Autobiography” on Saturday mornings at Emeritus College, a program for older adults at Santa Monica College, on the beach edge of Los Angeles. She has worked with two distinct generations of students — the first ones came of age during World War II, while her current pupils hail from the far safer world of suburban sprawl.

This is a “performance” class, more about students sharing what they have written and less about writing style. Ms. Roberts believes that what matters to her students is the chance to take stock in a safe setting, among peers. She still recalls a Dachau survivor who never spoke of his experience in class until the day he got up to read an account of the day the camp was liberated.

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TIME GOES BY | Fear of Getting Old

by Ronnie Bennett

Unpacking and settling into a new home is an excellent time for contemplation. The work is relatively mindless and the physical activity keeps blood flowing to the brain.

One of the topics taking up space in there has been fear of aging. It is bred into us from cradle and is responsible for ageism and and age discrimination in all their forms, for people lying about their age, for 30-year-olds believing they are over the hill and for the billions of dollars wasted on Botox and cosmetic surgery.

It doesn't matter how many ways you try to deny your age or how much money you spend on nips and tucks and potions and creams, you will get old and if you live long enough, you will look your age.
All that denial is not really about getting old; it's about being reminded that we will die. A healthy fear of death is good; it keeps us from doing stupid things that might kill us before our time. But we – western culture – have gone way too far in pretending that death doesn't exist, depriving ourselves of the conscious experience of getting old.

Because of keeping this blog, I probably spend more time than many people thinking about what getting old is really like. We have often discussed here how we are happy to leave behind the concern for our appearance that took up so much time and effort in our youth. We like the patience and tolerance we have gained, the diminished need to always be right and I especially appreciate my new-found ability to let it go, when I've been thwarted in a goal, without the drama I created about it when I was young and even middle-aged.
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The insurance doctor: Immigrant shunned medicine, but comforted by Medicare | coloradoan.com | The Coloradoan

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by By Peter Trozan

At 65 she enrolled in Medicare but only saw a doctor once during the next 25 years. At age 91, Jenny fell and broke her clavicle and severely injured her lower back and hip.

When she left the hospital, Jenny moved into my house, and together with my wife’s help, we took care of her 24/7. You see, Jenny, is my mother.

Although she experienced excruciating pain and would scream out when being moved, she adamantly refused pain medications. After five months she healed sufficiently to return to her own home. Last week Jenny fell again, this time fracturing her hip. Once again, she moved in with us, again refusing all prescription meds.

Because she used natural remedies, her medical expenses have been virtually non-existent. Nonetheless, it has been a great help and comfort having Medicare for those unforeseen accidents. Without a doubt, my mother is a rare individual, but even she has benefited from the medical support provided by our community:

> A pendant worn around her neck to call for help in an emergency (our own expense).

> Ambulance and paramedics (Medicare pays 80 percent).

> Emergency room and CT scans (Medicare pays 80 percent).

> Homecare services provided by the staff at Columbine. Since home care is far cheaper than having someone institutionalized, Medicare pays 100 percent for home care rather than the usual 80 percent.

> Hospice care for about 6 months a few years ago. This is supposed to be for terminally ill patients and is covered by Medicare at 100 percent. Jenny beat the odds and confounded the experts as she “graduated” out of Hospice.

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TIME GOES BY | The Essence of Elders

By Ronni Bennett

One of the highest compliments there is, is this: “I've always known that; why didn't I know it before." It occurs when hearing or reading something that initially sounds obvious, but on further thought is so right and true that it adds depths of understanding and clarity you didn't have before.

That happened yesterday reading a new post at David Wolfe's blog, Ageless Marketing.

"[In] the second half of life, the libido expresses desires to recreate the self in less materialistic, more symbolic ways, such as in one’s good works or 'giving back' to others as part of one’s legacy. This is one way people know they can live on, even if it's only in the minds of others.”

David is contrasting this later life development to the first half of our lives when our libido urges us relentlessly to preen and prance and posture in answer to nature's imperative for continuation of our species. Then he gets to my “aha” moment:

”...the Holy Grail in human personality development. At long last [in age] we may find the answer to the biggest question that ever arises in our minds: "Who am I?"

So simply put. So true. Something I have spent tens of thousands of words on this blog trying to get to. He further explains:
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